This is the main question i ask myself on a daily basis now. At least for the past week or so. What AM i doing? Nothing. Not literally. Of course i am making moves all for the positive. At least trying. I have my own business. I have a nice little work from home job. Supportive family and good friends. I have a regular routine: Work and workout. Weekends are for me or for my business. I don’t do much because its experience over pay right now. Meaning I’m working for experience with money as second important on my list. I work hard but i have little play. However i make up for that by planning travel trips with the money I make on the side. I call it my obsession. Others call it a hobby. Its a neat set up for my minimal lifestyle.
I don’t plan on living this way for the rest of my life. I do plan on living independently. Making great money. Supporting myself. Traveling. But I feel lost and confused. In the past year since school released me into the real world, I have been in and out of figuring out what my goals are and what i want out of life. Trial and Error has shifted and shaped things around a bit and some things I want or still want seem far from reality. Like having my own place. Moving to Miami. Stable job. Everything surely happens for a reason so I wonder day by day what am I to do. I’ve mentioned before, destiny is at my finger tips and I feel closer and closer to living a life I am destined to life. What will it be? When will this happen and where?
I feel like the life i was sort of brain washed to live and the path that was drawn out for me is right but i feel that im better off taking that path somewhere else. Like i am destined for something great and its not here. I’m a piece to a puzzle that fits even better on another board. Life is too short. Stress makes life shorter. I dont blame myself when i stress over trying not to let my 20’s go to waste figuring this shit out. Do i belong back in Jersey. Or does my “wild explorer” side of me belong somewhere even farther beyond the reaches of America. Its scary to envision but also exciting.
How much longer will i wait until i decide what i want to do with life. The American Dream is certainly lost in translation. American Dream means allowing the government to slave you into working your life to prepare for death. Not to forget you are being monitored doing so. I refuse. Call me an outcast. I see why I’m so much more different then people i know. Also KNEW, as I have watch old friends vanish before my eyes. I am different not so much as ordinary different but different in a highly unique way. I wouldn’t call it anything bad. I am a very open minded person. I like new things, ideas, cultures, and meeting all kinds of people. From classy, to punk, to foreign. You get the point.
I’ve spent numerous years getting to where i stand today. I have always had an idea of what the next year had in store for me but 2012 is a special one. I have no clue what it has to offer but a huge change will occur whether i decide so or it falls into place naturally. I have nothing to lose. I am ready!
~Note: This post is a bit personal but i felt it belonged in my travel blog as the topic of question relates to travel and overseas living~
